Shadow Babysits Cream
by Sammy Heroes
Summary: Without anyone to babysit Cream for the day, Vanilla 'asks' Shadow to babysit her for a whole day. What can go wrong. Rated T because you all know Shadow's bad vocabulary.


Vanilla sighed and hung up the phone. Not even Vector, who had an obvious crush on her, could take care of Cream. He was out on one of those Chaotix cases and he couldn't bring the little bunny along… and they were on the other side of the world. Vanilla took another look at her phone book. Sonic was out of the list since he was fighting some robots in Green Hill Zone and Amy had to take care of some business. Surprisingly, Knuckles was good at babysitting, but Cream said that if he wasn't guarding that Master Emerald he would have been fun to hang around. Vanilla trusted Tails, but seriously, a kid babysitting another kid? Let alone when they like each other in more than one way? Nope. Out of the question. Big was nowhere to be found. Too bad, Vanilla had called him several times already. That left one more phone number. She didn't like it, but she had no choice.

_Ring! Ring! Ring!_

"_Hello?"_

"Hello, Mr. Shadow."

"_Mrs. Vanilla?"_

"Yes, it's me. I need to ask for a favor." Vanilla frowned. "And I won't take a 'no' for an answer! I had several 'no's' already!" She could hear the hedgehog gulping from the other line.

"_What is this favor about?_"

"I need someone to babysit Cream while I'm visiting a friend in Station Square tomorrow." She said happily.

"_But-"_

"No 'but's' either! And don't tell me you are in a G.U.N. mission." Vanilla snapped.

"…" In fact, that was exactly what he was going to say, but now he knew he had no choice. "_When do I go to your house?"_

Vanilla smiled in triumph. "At 8:00 a.m., sweetie. Don't be late."

"_Alright."_ And the hedgehog hung up before the rabbit decided to ask him to bake cookies.

OOO

"Now, Cream, dear. Be nice to Mr. Shadow while I'm gone, ok?"

"Ok, mommy!"

Vanilla shut the door behind her, leaving Shadow and Cream in the living room. Cream's chao, Cheese, floated around her head while she looked at Shadow expectantly.

"So…" He started.

"So what?" she replied happily.

"What do you want to do first?"

"Well… We can start with breakfast. I just got out of bed."

Shadow sighed. "Ok." He got up and walked towards the kitchen. "What do you want?"

"You know how to cook, Mr. Shadow?"

"I'm no chef, but I have to know some, because I live alone."

"That must be so sad…" Cream looked at him with sympathy.

Shadow sighed while taking out a plate and cup. "Sometimes… Anyway, what do you want, kid?"

OOO

After breakfast, Cream decided they should watch TV. There was a little debate in what they should watch, but Cream convinced him to watch something that, in Shadow's opinion, it was vile. Even for a six year old.

"No. Not this shit…" Shadow said as he stared in disbelief at the TV.

"Mr. Shadow? You are not supposed to say those words."

"Sorry… But, we are seriously going to watch this?"

"Yep!"

_My Little Pony! My Little Pony! Ahhhhhh…_

"I'm not watching this 'friendship' shit…" Shadow started to get up but was held back by the little rabbit.

"No, Mr. Shadow. You are going to stay here and you're going to like it." She said calmingly and happily.

Shadow sighed and did as he was told. He never thought that the little rabbit held such strength.

_The first two episodes later…_

"I always loved the first episodes! Did you liked it, Mr. Shadow? Mr. Shadow?" Cream asked but Shadow was busy looking the back of the 'ponies' season 1 DVD.

"Ugh?" He looked at Cream.

"Did YOU liked it?" the rabbit repeated.

Shadow looked at the DVD case and threw it away. He just acted cool. "No, no. Like I said… it's bullshit."

"Yeah, sure…" Cream smirked knowingly. She took out a pencil and a piece of paper and wrote his name on it.

"What are you doing?" Shadow asked.

She did not answer but instead showed the paper to him. It said 'Pony Club' at the top and under the title, 27 names were written. His included. There were other names he recognized. _Vector, Knuckles, Espio, Tails, Amy Rose, Omega-_

"Wait. Omega has babysat you?"

"Once. But he loved the show. Now, I just need to convince the rest of the world to like it."

"_She's very manipulating…" _Shadow thought.

OOO

"Come on, Mr. Shadow!"

"I just can't-"

"Do it." She said firmly.

"What?"

"Do it!"

"Ok! Geesh… now I know why Vanilla called me. I never knew what kind of manipulating little monster you are…"

Cream just laughed and hugged Shadow's waist. Cheese was instructed to stay in the house for the moment while both hedgehog and rabbit went outside.

"Chaos Control!"

They ended up in the living room.

"Whoa! That was so cool! I never chaos controlled before. Thank you!"

"You're welcome."

"Now we have to play dress up!"

That was it. Shadow was screwed…

OOO

"Come out, Mr. Shadow!"

"No way!"

"Please?"

"You ruined my manliness."

"It's just a custom."

"That's not the problem, kid. The problem is of WHAT the custom is about."

Cream frowned. This was the last after 57 customs, really. It couldn't be worse than the Princess Peach custom she made the hedgehog wear. She knocked on the closet door again.

"Please? After this, I won't give you more customs."

"Promise, kid?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die. Stick a cupcake in my eye."

She heard the hedgehog sighing from the other side of the door. "Fine. But don't laugh like you did with all those customs."

"I can't promise that but I'll try not to." She sat down on her tiny little bed, Cheese sitting beside her.

Shadow opened the door. He was wearing… oh. Please, not THAT custom.

Cream covered her mouth, a vague attempt to hide her giggles. Cheese however, did not bother to do so.

"I knew you were going to laugh…" Shadow sighed again.

"I didn't know you will look so funny!"

"Please, anyone dressed like Princess Elise looks funny. Not to mention that Sonic '06 was a total failure even though Silver is Ok."

Cream couldn't hold it anymore and started rolling on the floor, grabbing her stomach. Shadow rolled his eyes and went back to the closet to take off that stupid dress.

OOO

"I don't like it."

"But…"

"I hate tea. It's disgusting herbs make me nauseous."

"I use soda, not tea. I only use tea when mommy it's here."

"Alright." Shadow held the small plastic cup towards Cream so she could fill it. He was sitting in a small pink plastic chair in front of a kid's size table with a tea set above it. Cheese was taking a nap on the far corner of Cream's room and every wall was painted pink. It was depressing.

"Now, Mr. Shadow. You are holding the tea cup wrong. You don't hold it with your whole hand. You hold it with your thumb and index finger only."

Shadow switched his fingers. "Like this?"

"Yep!" Cream said happily and later frowned. "And sit straight!"

Shadow did without hesitation.

OOO

_Currently in Shadow's motorcycle…_

"So, kid, what do you want for lunch?" He told Cream, who was currently hugging his back so she wouldn't fall. She was also wearing a black helmet.

Cream thought for a moment. "Could we have McDonald's?"

"Damn McDonald's, kid. They don't even serve healthy food."

"But-"

"No 'buts' today, kid. I'm in charge of you today and you will not eat that kind of greasy, unhealthy shit."

"Mr. Shadow?"

"Most people prefer a soda instead of water. And water is healthier than any of that bullshit people drink."

"Mr. Shadow?"

"Did you know that most of United States of America's population is currently dealing with obesity?"

"Mr. Shadow…" Now Cream was getting irritated. But the hedgehog did not paid attention to her.

"-And it's all because of franchises like McDonald's. They even use the same old oil to fry everything. Damn greasy burgers… Damn French fries… Damn Burger King! DAMN THEM ALL TO-"

"MR. SHADOW!" Cream snapped.

"What!?"

The rabbit took a deep breath before answering. "I wanted to take a salad and a strawberry smoothie. I don't even like hamburgers."

"Oh… Sorry, kid."

"It's alright. And I liked your speech anyway. It makes me want to eat more healthy things. Maybe you should give the speech to Sonic, he likes those chili hot dogs, you know. Besides, what are hot dogs made of? They aren't real dogs, aren't they?" Cream asked with worry.

"You don't want to know kid…"

OOO

"I'm a MAN. I don't play with dolls."

"Tails plays with me sometimes."

"But he's a kid like you. And besides, I had just enough with those customs."

"Please…" Cream looked at him with puppy eyes. They were cute but manipulating. But Shadow was strong.

"No."

Cream started crying. For the first time in a really long time, Shadow was insecure. "Don't- don't cry, kid. We will play dolls. Hell, we can even play with those horrifying pony dolls if you want to."

Cream wiped her tears. "Really?"

"Really…" Shadow sighed. _'Damn it… what have I gotten myself into? Now I have a soft spot for kids? These day definitely couldn't get worse.'_

_An hour later…_

"That was the most horrifying experience in my entire fucking existence." Shadow said while lying on the floor covered by many dolls and stuffed animals. He would have sworn one of those looked like a certain two tailed fox.

OOO

"Where do babies come from, Mr. Shadow?"

"Um… why don't you ask your mother that?"

"You don't answer a question with a question."

"You know what, kid? Bullshit."

OOO

"What are we having for diner?" Cream asked while watching TV.

Shadow thought for a moment. "We are not having McDonald's, that's for sure."

"What about pizza?"

"What did I told you about healthy things?"

"It's just a pizza." Cream glared at Shadow. "Have you ever tried pizza?"

Shadow shocked his head. Cream and Cheese gasped. "Chao? Chao?"

"You are right, Cheese. We will order that pizza and Mr. Shadow is going to like it!" Cream got up and walked over to the phone.

"I don't want pizza!"

Cream grinned. "Ok, then. I'll call Mr. Sonic and tell him you liked My Little Pony."

Shadow glared at the rabbit. "Fine. We'll order pizza." Cream laughed and dialed the pizza delivery number.

"_Manipulating little monster…"_ Shadow thought. "_It wouldn't surprise me if she had a notebook full of blackmailing material. If she does, I'm pretty sure she wrote down the 'pony' thing about me…"_

OOO

"Cream! Mr. Shadow! I'm back!" Vanilla entered the silent house. There was no movement. The rabbit walked towards the living room. The TV was on, but Shadow, Cream and Cheese were sleeping soundly. Cheese was sleeping over Shadow's head and Cream's head rested on his lap. Vanilla tried to hold back a giggle. They looked so cute.

Maybe she should ask Shadow to babysit Cream next time…

**Cream might have been OOC in this oneshot, but either way, it was fun to write. Review!**


End file.
